4Q07

Where did the year go? Tomorrow's the start of the fourth quarter and that'll probably swoosh past as well.

Work-wise, it's been a heavy nine months. And I think my new bosses secretly love me. That can be the only reason why they're giving me so much more work to do than my colleagues. I've got my own room in the office and more importantly, RESPECT. I've been to Hamburg, Copenhagen and Oslo this year, and I'm off to London in November for some serious schmoozing.

The family side of things is good. My parents are surprisingly supportive and have pretty much let me live my life as I want to. And my father has stopped trying to get me to find religion. Plus now I have a cat.

So I don't have a love-life. Which really is better than being under the delusion that I have one. But miraculously I am coming to the realisation that if I'm going to find a relationship I'm happy to be in, I need to start looking for someone with brains and not just a walking dildo.

I may have failed my first sitting of the CFA1 (my excuse being that I just had no time to study for it being a fairly valid one), and I didn't have enough time or the tenacity to stick to regular driving lessons (and it's not my fault that the system is so fully-booked that there's a six month wait to get a test date)... but hey I got myself a new pair of boobs! And they are doing very well, thank you very much :)

Three months to go, how do I make the most of it?

1. I need to go teetotal for October. I have been most unproductive in the past few weeks, and I'm certain it's cos I've been drinking way too much during that time.

2. I need to start eating healthy again. Basically, I need to detox.

3. I need to start hitting the gym and the yoga studio again, to reverse the effects of the past 6 weeks. And to get my body bikini-perfect for Goa in December.

4. I need to get my goddamn office in order. I can't work at a clean table but the need to be able to locate important documents is slightly more important. I need to start using the filing lady, except I feel really bad about it cos she's so overworked as it is.

5. I will ask Hot Colleague out. I was planning to this coming week - you know, strike while the proverbial iron is hot - but I realise that he's being called back to the army for a couple of weeks. I'll do it in late October, I promise.

6. I will go to Goa and have a fucking good time sans drugs.

7. I will thoroughly consider sorting out my room.

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I can't wait for Goa.

...

Ugh. I do not feel good. I should have finished that bagel for breakfast yesterday. I should have had something heartier than Japanese for lunch. I should have eaten dinner. I should NOT have mixed beer, wine and martinis. I should NOT have allowed my drunk colleague to drive me home, because drink-driving is WRONG. I should have drunk a litre of water and eaten a banana before going to bed.

I need a hot, greasy English breakfast and an isotonic drink, followed by a long walk by a river.

I miss L_____.

I am not fond of shaky buildings.

The novelty of working on the 33rd floor of a sea-fronting building has lost its lustre. If an earthquake (and its aftershocks) 670km away can cause my coffee to ripple, the windows to whine and its blinds to swing, and generally make me feel like I am having the worst hangover ever, then IT IS NOT A GOOD THING.

And yet here I sit tapping away at my keyboard. Because while buildings further away from the earthquake are vacated at the slightest hint of a tremor, the security and management of this one remain asleep.

Moolah.

Yesterday, I managed to convince the HR people that my driving lessons should be considered as a "self-improvement course" and as such I should be reimbursed for it.

And then I realised that I had a $600 claim outstanding on the company left over from my working trip to Europe in June.

When I got home, I found a letter from the hospital waiting to inform me that I was getting reimbursed just over $1,500 from my boob job.

So just like that I'll be getting what is equivalent to an additional month's pay in my account.

Maybe my mother is right - the universe rewards genuinely generous people (I would like to believe that I am one of those) . With cash. [My mother is Chinese, which means that only cold hard cash counts. Or gold. Heavens forbid if the universe should dare attempt to reward me with something as abstract as "happiness" or "satisfaction".]

And to top it off, it seems that I have lost all desire to engage in what used to be one of my favourite activities: shopping. But perhaps that's because there's nothing nice in the shops these days. Except that pair of to-die-for black pumps with super skinny heels that oh my god I MUST GO OUT AND BUY DURING LUNCH HOUR.

Oh. I guess it's back then.

Whodathunkit!

So perhaps I've misrepresented the men of S________ in the past. There are among them individuals who are above and beyond what is average by any standards, and some of them are in fact remarkably ... erm ... eligible.

And such is the case with a particular colleague of mine. I first met him about five years ago, while we were both studying in L_____. At that point I was dating someone else, but a friend did comment that my future colleague was rather Hot and that it would be amusing if we were to end up dating each other back in S________. It was at the time a little glimmer of hope that returning to S________ wouldn't be akin to entering a world absolutely void of Worthy Men.

The "Man" part of my brain was preoccupied with someone else in the first 1.5 years that I returned, and the thought of taking a dip in unexplored waters never crossed my mind. [Ok, that's a lie. But it's more dramatic this way.] But now that this part of my brain has been cleansed, my attention has been rather taken by this colleague.

He would be, in every respect, a Perfect Boyfriend. He's got everything a girl would want from one. Aside from being a really nice guy, he's intelligent, funny, open-minded and genuinely confident in a very charming, understated way. He possesses the rare qualities of having an expansive view of the world and a magnanimous approach to people. On top of that, he has the highly attractive physical characteristics of a lean, muscular, well-proportioned body, a great tan, fine cheekbones and an excellent jaw. He smells kinda nice too.

I've had to work pretty closely with him and it now seems that we may have, well, started to flirt with each other. As I have mentioned before, I am largely unschooled in the art of flirting in a work environment. However, although I appreciate that he would be considered good-looking, I am just not physically attracted to him. I do wish I were because it really is the only thing holding me back from giving it a proper go.

Sigh. Perhaps Bazza is right. Maybe over time I will become physically attracted to him.

In the meantime, I have someone with whom there is mutual appreciation (though not of the physical kind), who responds to all my e-mails and text messages, and who treats me with the chivalry of a true gentleman. And honestly that's a million light years more than what I've had in my recent past.

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That post took really long to write up because I've been checking out '80s and early '90s rock videos on YouTube. The Meatloaf ones are among the best, second only to my beloved Axl Rose. And Jon Bon Jovi (of course not forgetting the smokin' hot Tico Torres). So I guess that makes it third. Oh My God I am ADDICTED. Did you know that Meatloaf did a cover of Celine Dion's "It's all Coming Back to me Now"? I actually love it!

[It's so easy to admit embarrassing things like that when you're hiding behind a pseudonym...]

Post-Event.

And so the work week is over. The Big Event me and my team of 5 overworked/underpaid colleagues went smoothly and ended a resounding success. Some have called it a historical landmark, but really, the subject matter was so esoteric that you'd never have realised it. For a week I have virtually run my feet raw pulling things together (while inflicting the full force of my inner control freak/bitch on people who don't matter anyway - but damn it was fun). My head has grown so big from people telling me what a good job I've done, I fear I may lose my balance sitting down.


The experience had me immersed in the multi-layered world of diplomacy and embellished my ability to speak at length about everything without saying anything at all. I have gone a step further and learnt how to analyse these seemingly meaningless conversations to expose the hidden truths underneath - and I now know how to use this to my advantage. I have been admitted into that inner sanctum of rookies with whom Very Important People condescend to sharing casual jokes and personal stories.


I have (re)discovered that all hot men are at the very least open to opportunities to cheat on their wives/girlfriends.


I am also convinced that I need to find a Very Successful (Hot) Man to be my husband because spouses are a great conversation topic when you've run out of everything else. (And because I'm still shallow.)

Catgut.

How is it 5:51pm already? There's only 1.5 days of the weekend left!

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Got my bandages taken off 5 days ago. What a huge relief! The dissolvable stitches are still in but it looks like the scarring will be minimal. The doctor announced that I look great and that they look natural (well I guess he'd have to say that but it made me grin anyway), did a check, told me they're healing perfectly and sent me on my way.

For the first time since the operation, I got up this morning without an intense pain in my left boob. The skin is starting to look less taut now. (So's my arse incidentally, I think I'll start hitting the gym again next week before I lose my boot completely.) Hee hee hee I can't wait to show them off!

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If you've ever wondered how dissolvable stitches (or, if you want to sound in-the-know, "absorbable sutures") work, apparently they're made of natural materials such as processed collagen derived from sheep intestines, silk, hair, and synthetic stuff that the body can naturally decompose. Sexy hey.