Find me

one of these, now!

Please?


...

Whodathunkit!

So perhaps I've misrepresented the men of S________ in the past. There are among them individuals who are above and beyond what is average by any standards, and some of them are in fact remarkably ... erm ... eligible.

And such is the case with a particular colleague of mine. I first met him about five years ago, while we were both studying in L_____. At that point I was dating someone else, but a friend did comment that my future colleague was rather Hot and that it would be amusing if we were to end up dating each other back in S________. It was at the time a little glimmer of hope that returning to S________ wouldn't be akin to entering a world absolutely void of Worthy Men.

The "Man" part of my brain was preoccupied with someone else in the first 1.5 years that I returned, and the thought of taking a dip in unexplored waters never crossed my mind. [Ok, that's a lie. But it's more dramatic this way.] But now that this part of my brain has been cleansed, my attention has been rather taken by this colleague.

He would be, in every respect, a Perfect Boyfriend. He's got everything a girl would want from one. Aside from being a really nice guy, he's intelligent, funny, open-minded and genuinely confident in a very charming, understated way. He possesses the rare qualities of having an expansive view of the world and a magnanimous approach to people. On top of that, he has the highly attractive physical characteristics of a lean, muscular, well-proportioned body, a great tan, fine cheekbones and an excellent jaw. He smells kinda nice too.

I've had to work pretty closely with him and it now seems that we may have, well, started to flirt with each other. As I have mentioned before, I am largely unschooled in the art of flirting in a work environment. However, although I appreciate that he would be considered good-looking, I am just not physically attracted to him. I do wish I were because it really is the only thing holding me back from giving it a proper go.

Sigh. Perhaps Bazza is right. Maybe over time I will become physically attracted to him.

In the meantime, I have someone with whom there is mutual appreciation (though not of the physical kind), who responds to all my e-mails and text messages, and who treats me with the chivalry of a true gentleman. And honestly that's a million light years more than what I've had in my recent past.

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That post took really long to write up because I've been checking out '80s and early '90s rock videos on YouTube. The Meatloaf ones are among the best, second only to my beloved Axl Rose. And Jon Bon Jovi (of course not forgetting the smokin' hot Tico Torres). So I guess that makes it third. Oh My God I am ADDICTED. Did you know that Meatloaf did a cover of Celine Dion's "It's all Coming Back to me Now"? I actually love it!

[It's so easy to admit embarrassing things like that when you're hiding behind a pseudonym...]

Post-Event.

And so the work week is over. The Big Event me and my team of 5 overworked/underpaid colleagues went smoothly and ended a resounding success. Some have called it a historical landmark, but really, the subject matter was so esoteric that you'd never have realised it. For a week I have virtually run my feet raw pulling things together (while inflicting the full force of my inner control freak/bitch on people who don't matter anyway - but damn it was fun). My head has grown so big from people telling me what a good job I've done, I fear I may lose my balance sitting down.


The experience had me immersed in the multi-layered world of diplomacy and embellished my ability to speak at length about everything without saying anything at all. I have gone a step further and learnt how to analyse these seemingly meaningless conversations to expose the hidden truths underneath - and I now know how to use this to my advantage. I have been admitted into that inner sanctum of rookies with whom Very Important People condescend to sharing casual jokes and personal stories.


I have (re)discovered that all hot men are at the very least open to opportunities to cheat on their wives/girlfriends.


I am also convinced that I need to find a Very Successful (Hot) Man to be my husband because spouses are a great conversation topic when you've run out of everything else. (And because I'm still shallow.)

Hot Man Alert:

Guillermo Arduino. He's an international weather anchor and host of CNN World Report based at the CNN Center in Atlanta. He kinda looks like a more pleasant version of Julian McMahon, and has an incredibly sexy accent. Carries a suit well too. Muy caliente.

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The men I fancy typically display 'M' shaped male pattern baldness. I can't decide if it's that I find older men or high foreheads attractive. I am also only attracted to strong, high nose bridges on men - what I've termed "continuous nose and forehead" - but everyone knows that (although few know why...).

Strings and Lines.

This morning has been marked by a singular lack of motivation to work.

This downward spiral into a state of indolence may have been sparked off by a particularly annoying argument I had with the Director yesterday. The argument was about how long we would require a harpist to play at an upcoming Big Dinner. I don't get his obsession with harpists and I honestly don't think guests who've just spent a whole day at a meeting pretending to be interested in international policies would give two shits about whether or not a harpist plays 3 sets of 45 min instead of 2 sets of 30 min when they're at a dinner with good (free) food and better (FREE) booze. What I do know is that (1) the harpist is a human being and not a robot, and (2) we can't squeeze two harpists into our budget. And seriously, in the Grand Scheme of Things this really isn't an issue to harp on. (Ha ha, I can't believe I cracked that one, but I just couldn't help it.)

...

I have recently begun noticing that there are actually Hot Men working in this building, spotting three (the third may have just been here for a meeting but I can continue to hope) in the past few weeks. I'm positive I've seen the first two before, I just never really noticed them. And by noticed I mean regard-with-appreciation-and-feeling-the-sudden-desire-to-make-babies. And I do also believe that I have been noticed in return. I have been informed that this (being noticed in return) is likely to be because I am now completely free of Men-related emotional baggage. Did I look so weighed-down previously? Perhaps I did, I do feel a lot "lighter" these days (but that could also be because I really like my new job - harpist-issues aside).

Anyway, the point is, what do I do now? How do I act on this sudden revelation that Hot Men exist in the same building where I spend most of my waking hours? (I have my own room in the office dammit and it needs to be "broken in"!) When noticed, do I continue to stare in appreciation or do I coyly (or perhaps smugly...?) look away? Do I even smile, and what kind of smile should it be? Having only played the Game in bars where everybody's drunk and doesn't care about "protocol", I find myself completely at a loss of knowing the Rules in a work environment.

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Ok. Back to work.